59. Picky Photos

10.30am on Saturday I joined a throng of persons of a slightly ageing disposition for the flu jab at my doctors surgery…you could almost hear them tutting as I walked in…with little people in tow. Tsk what on earth would make me eligible! Getting looked up & down by a senior citizen where clearly the eye balling is less about my skinny jeans and more about them trying to ascertain (through bifocals) what my ailment might be.
The jab itself took seconds….not even long enough for the little people to oooh & ahh over mummy’s bravery (this being the only hospital appointment they attend with me!)
Practically pain free……until mid afternoon when the effects kicked in…think hunch back of Notre Dame but move the strange distortion on to the outside of my upper arm – combine that with lethargy, a tickly throat & a pounding head….my weekend had started well.
My other weekend highlight was a date with a photo booth…..a trip to Stockholm at the end of November for a Melanoma project workshop requires a valid passport…mine needs renewing.
Cue a family outing to the Supermarket….the littlest member of the household & I stop off at Customer Services to change £20 for coins that are photo booth friendly….how much of this do you need changed asks the polite lady….”all of it…mummy is very picky with photos!”
I would love to dispute this….but really….it’s a passport photo…I’m stuck with it!WP_20141023_008
The real truth is I am somewhat photo obsessive anyway. I take hundreds. Digitally save them & never getting around to that “cull” which I keep saying I intend to do. I also should confess, since Melanoma, I spend lots of time comparing my moles on old photos…I have actually lost hours searching online for a photo of my back. Evidence…proof of an exact month when it appeared.
I was reminded recently by The Surgeon of the importance of taking regular photographs of Moles on my skin. I only get to see him every 6 months & whilst theoretically I should be able to point out every single change and he too would instantly spot Moles that are of interest, having that photographic back up will ensure that a few days before my next skin check I can compare photographs and point out ones I need reassurance over.
I torture myself….trust me it is torture…I take those photographs…and on here I frequently encourage you to do the same….on your own or with a friend (wink wink)….better still like quite a few other Melanoma patients I have something called Mole Mapping.
This procedure sounds glorious…..like an ordinance survey of your skin. Truthfully it is far less advanced & sadly still comes back to the human eye.
Just over a year ago I had that long awaited Mole Mapping appointment. The digital images of 37+ Moles were taken and recently I went back for an annual review.
The original Mole Map was done by a Dermatologist…it was the same Dermatologist at the review.
I stood in my trimmed with lace smalls staring at a computer screen image the displayed various pictures of me a year previously – full body shots, close ups and Moles……looking at myself nearly naked with various relatively recent scars on show was somewhat uncomfortable.
I didn’t know what to expect last year, but left quite pleased that so many Moles were highlighted for monitoring.
Since then, the team at Oxford have removed lots of those moles.
So there I was looking at a photograph of a Mole on the screen & I would say…”yes that one has gone now”….the Dermatologist would pinpoint where on my body the Mole was & then said “yes it’s gone”…and then to my utter shock he added “I can see why they took that one off!”
This happened 9 times.
9 Moles that he decided despite being visually unusual, could be left there to monitor (please note at this point I have not been seen or contacted by said Dermatologist for a check-up or skin review for a whole year until this second Mole Mapping appointment)…. and during this last year The Surgeon has said….”given your history…given your Melanomas were not typical, so long as you don’t mind a tiny 1-2cm scar, lets remove those Moles.”
Should we take the surgical approach or the watch and wait approach…well this particular patient says…chop them off…and whilst you are at it take off a couple more & make me a handbag with them.
Interestingly during this 10 minute long Mole Mapping no photographs of any new Moles were taken…..despite the fact that I know there are new moles.
Patient care is just as much about doing the job you are there to do as it is about instilling trust & sometimes that might mean more than just ticking the boxes.
So for now I will continue to be picky & selective with my home photos….and I will keep my eye out for changes. And I won’t mind even a little bit if I hear the words “let’s get rid of that Mole because I don’t like the look of it”.
Photographs are vital. A useful reference tool….but the best tool for survival of Melanoma….would be early removal of Moles with a scalpel.